Mere Paas Cash Hai, Mere Paas Caste Hai, Tumhare Paas Kya Hai?

I know I failed miserably in keeping my resolution of two weeks ago to blog more regularly. But I have decided to not give up and follow that wonderful poem which we had in school which told us 'tis a lesson you should learn, try try again; if at once you don't succeed try try again'

And since it is Monday I am going to start again with Politics

There were once three friends, Rich Ram, Caste Ram and Aam Ram. The three of them lived in the same neighbourhood, studied in the the same school, lusted after the same chicks, shared the same dreams (getting into an IIM) - all in all they were pretty similar to one another. There were some minor differences as well like Rich Ram was rich, Caste Ram was from a backward caste and Aam Ram well he was neither rich nor from a backward caste.

But nobody ever took much notice of that and in fact everyone in the neighbourhood saw them together and said, "Those three are like triplets, may they never be separated'

The three boys also felt the same way. To prove that they were serious Rich, Caste and Aam had pricked their fingers, drawn blood and stored that blood in a single bottle. Said Rich, "No one can look at this blood and say if it is Rich, Caste or Aam. We are now blood brothers"

Time flew by and soon they were in class XII. It was a tense time after all their future depended on it what with a big board exam on hand and all those engineering and medical entrances that were due after that. Despite the rise in the mercury the three friends remained steadfast and their biggest worry was what if they all got admissions into a different college.

It was unlikely given that all three of them were average students and in their heart of hearts they knew that they were unlikely to do spectacularly well in the board exams or clear any of the medical and engineering exams. It was most likely that they would all be together doing their BSc in the local college.

The exams came and went and would you believe it the three had identical marks in their board exam which was well below the cutoffs for engineering and medical. The friends having collected their marksheet walked home and began to make plans for their new life at the local Science college.

Rich Ram entered his house and told his parents that he had only got 70 per cent and so in all probability he would join the local college and do a BSc in Mathematics. he added that Caste and Aam were likely to ollow a similar course.

His parents just smiled and said, "Beta, don't be silly. We have spoken to the private engineering principal here and he has said that for 10 lakhs you will be given a seat for engineering." Rich looked at his parents and said, "But won't that be unfair to the guy who got 71% and does not have 10 lakh? Smells like reservation to me!" His father said, " Don't be silly beta. What id the use of all this money if we can't help you. Secondly just because you did badly in one exam does not mean you should not be an engineer. There is no difference between 70 and 71%. And anyways what future do science graduates have?" All this set Rich thinking.

In the neeigbouring house Caste broke the news to his parents and told them about the BSc plans. His parents smiled and said, "Beta I have spoken to the local engineering college and you will get admission at 70%." Caste Ram looked at his parents suspiciously and said, "How is that possible?" His father looked benignly at him and said, "It's all thanks to your ancestors good deeds. Your great-grandfather lived in a very backward area almost two hundred years ago and so you are part of the OBC list." Caste was stunned and he said, "But if I use such a benefit then what happens to the guy who got 71%. This smells like reservation to me." His father said, "Beta 200 years ago even if your great grandfather had got 90% they would not let him into college, so it is only fair that you reap the benefits of that injustice. Besides do you want to disprespect your ancestors by not using the certificate." All this set Caste thinking.

Aam Ram came home and revealed his marks and told his parents that he would have to do his BSc. His parents smiled and said, "Which ever government college you get in on the basis of these marks you take admission. We are fine with that."

The three friends met in the evening and exchanged notes. Aam said, "So we are all going to do our BSc?" Rich said, "My parents are getting me admission in the prvate engineering college. I know it sounds like reservation but the truth is that my father will be very disappointed if I dont become an engineer and our shastras forbid us from hurting our parents."

Caste said, "My parents are getting me admission into the government engineering college adn I know it sounds like reservation but the truth is that to not go there would to let my ancestor's great sacrifices in the past go in vain."
Aaam looked at them and said, "But what about our dreams of a meritocracy and equality and end of class and caste?"

Rich said, "It is meritocracy only. I have done better than other people who can pay capitation and so I have got admission"

Caste said, "Pure meritocracy. I have done better than the other reserved candidates so I am getting admission."

Aam thought about it and said, "Yes, and complete meritocracy. I guess that my parentswere not meritorious enough to make enough money and my great grandfather was not meritorious enough to come from a backward place and so this is what I merit."

The three friends nodded and went their separate ways.

Epilogue

Last hear Aam was berating his father for not being rich or backward enough.